Vile Jokes - Offensive Jokes

How many cancer patients does it take to change a light-bulb?
Answer:
Hover for answer 12, one to change the light-bulb and 11 to say "aw he's so brave".
Added: 01/19/2014 12:35 AM

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How does a Mexican family take a family picture?
Answer:
Hover for answer Hop in the bed of a pickup and run a red light.
Added: 01/18/2014 6:31 PM

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Why is there no black character in the game "Clue"?
Answer:
Hover for answer Because then it would be called "Solved"
Added: 01/18/2014 12:31 PM

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Three families live in a tower block. A white family, a black family and a mexican family. Suddenly, a plane crashes into the building. What family survives?
Answer:
Hover for answer The white family, since the kids were at school, and the parents were at work.
Added: 01/18/2014 6:25 AM

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What do you call a kid with Down's Syndrome who got hit by a bus?
Answer:
Hover for answer Mashed potato.
Added: 01/18/2014 12:21 AM

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What has more brains than Kurt Cobain?
Answer:
Hover for answer The wall behind him.
Added: 01/17/2014 6:19 PM

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What do you call a black man crossed with an octopus?
Answer:
Hover for answer Beats me, but it sure can pick cotton!
Added: 01/17/2014 12:07 PM

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A Muslim walks into a bar...
Answer:
Hover for answer No one survived the blast.
Added: 01/17/2014 6:05 AM

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Why did Hitler commit suicide?
Answer:
Hover for answer He saw the gas bill.
Added: 01/17/2014 12:00 AM

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What do you call a 6 year old with no friends
Answer:
Hover for answer A Sandy Hook survivor.
Added: 01/16/2014 5:57 PM

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What do Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker have in common?
Answer:
Hover for answer They both died at 95.
Added: 01/16/2014 11:56 AM

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What's a similarity between a fat lady and a brick?
Answer:
Hover for answer Sooner or later they will both get laid by a Mexican.
Added: 01/16/2014 5:56 AM

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Whats the difference between a cow and 9/11?
Answer:
Hover for answer You can't milk a cow for 12 years.
Added: 01/15/2014 11:54 PM

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Why are 9/11 victims considered the fastest readers in the world?
Answer:
Hover for answer They went through 90 stories in 30 seconds.
Added: 01/15/2014 5:53 PM

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Why were the twin towers sad on 9/11?
Answer:
Hover for answer They ordered pepperoni pizza but got plane.
Added: 01/15/2014 11:51 AM

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What's the difference between Johnnie Walker and John Wayne?
Answer:
Hover for answer Johnnie Walker is still killing Indians.
Added: 01/15/2014 5:51 AM

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Did you hear the one about the baby with aids? It never gets old.
Added: 01/14/2014 11:43 PM

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What do you call a black woman that gets an abortion?
Answer:
Hover for answer A Crime fighter
Added: 01/14/2014 5:41 PM

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What do you call an Ethiopian taking a shit?
Answer:
Hover for answer A showoff.
Added: 01/14/2014 11:36 AM

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A black man walks into a bar with a parrot. The bartender say,"Aww cool where did you get it?" The parrot says,"Africa".
Added: 01/14/2014 5:35 AM

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Why do white people stuggle with chess?
Answer:
Hover for answer They can't comprehend that not all white pieces are kings.
Added: 01/13/2014 11:34 PM

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What's nine inches long, purple and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat?
Answer:
Hover for answer Her miscarriage
Added: 01/13/2014 5:17 PM

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A man goes to the doctor requesting birth control for his 10 year old daughter. The doctor, surprised, exclaims "Your daughter is ten and she is sexually active?!" He replies "I wouldn't call it active. She typically just lies there and cries."
Added: 01/13/2014 11:14 AM

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Did you know Brett Favre is the only QB in history to record his own sack?
Added: 09/17/2013 9:19 PM

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Why is Virginia Tech so bad at basketball?
Answer:
Hover for answer They lost their best shooter
Added: 08/15/2013 11:11 AM

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What's the name of the new boy band from Haiti?
Answer:
Hover for answer New Blocks on the Kids
Added: 08/15/2013 5:07 AM

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What kind of cigarettes does a hippy smoke?
Answer:
Hover for answer Yours
Added: 08/14/2013 11:07 PM

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What do you get when you cross a black person with an Asian?
Answer:
Hover for answer Someone who can steal a car but can't drive it.
Added: 08/14/2013 3:43 PM

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What do you get when you cross a black person and a Jew?
Answer:
Hover for answer Some who's confused whether to steal or buy wholesale.
Added: 08/14/2013 9:35 AM

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What do you get when you cross a black person and a Mexican?
Answer:
Hover for answer Someone who is too lazy to steal.
Added: 08/14/2013 3:20 AM

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